Thanksgiving and Christmas have always been times when people are upset, but don’t know they are upset. That is because the upset is low grade and is chalked up to being a result of being pressed, too busy, etc. At a time that should be a celebration, instead people get irritated with crowds in the stores, driving on the freeway, and especially with family members.
So, does this make any sense? The holidays are billed as a time of joy, happiness and love. Especially our time with family and friends. Too often I see people that are exhausted and relieved when the holidays are over. So, what’s up?
Try this on … back in the day when you were a child, let’s say 6-8 years old for the purpose of this conversation. You were in a routine of getting up at the same time and getting ready to leave for school. Classes, recesses and other activities were scheduled. School let out every day at a set time. Even the routine when you got home from school was pretty much the same every day.
Then along comes the holiday season. You were excited about it and nothing is routine. You are out of school. Maybe you are traveling or have visitors. Some of the people involved you know and some you don’t. Some are staying at your house and sleeping accommodations are different. Your visitors don’t have their schedule either. There is excitement around what gifts you might get for Christmas and not knowing is sometimes upsetting.
The point is these thing happened and there was no completion of your feeling upset. It just faded away after the holidays were over. But, the feelings didn’t go away. So when something similar happens the next year, you get that upset once again. It is a wonder that anyone has a wonderful holiday! The more adult we are the more we expect to handle this, yet we are often without the tools to do it.
Here is what I suggest. Slow down. Simplify. Appreciate the people you love and be thankful for the life you have and the people in it. Finally, choose to have your age be the guide for your behavior rather than allow an eight year old to do it.
If you would like to have conversation about this give me a call. Happy Holidays!