The May 10th issue of Sports Illustrated features an article titled, “Then There Were Four” by Chris Ballard. The story is about the actions Coach Mike Allen took with the basketball team at Gunderson High School (San Jose, CA). If you have seen the old movie Mr. Carter that starred Samuel L. Jackson you have the basic story line.

The article debates the merits of Coach Allen’s actions and the impact on four young athletes. You can read and decide that for yourself. I am much more interested in what called for those actions to be taken, even if it was just the coach’s viewpoint. I propose that the symptoms he dealt with are not unusual but commonplace.

If I said the value in athletics is the opportunity to develop young people, most of you would give me a big nod, yes? Let’s eliminate the natural growth that happens for kids. Sports can be an extraordinary experience. What turns this extraordinary opportunity into an ordinary or even damaging experience?

Here’s a hint. It’s not the kids. So that leaves … you got it, adults. That’s parents, coaches, quasi coaches and, of course, the general public.

For the athlete, the experience usually begins somewhere between the ages of six and 10. The adults in their lives that are on a pedestal are their parents and their coaches. They notice everything they do and say.

The adults are often times more interested in winning or college scholarships or just plain old “looking good.” They’re usually not interested in making sure the message delivered is about values and how to treat other people (teammates and opponents). To learn to take responsibility for their actions and their lives is a lifetime lesson.

Youth sports are in bad shape. A story to illustrate … last summer I was visiting friends in Seattle, WA. While I was there, their son was playing on a team in an 11-12 yr. olds basketball tournament. They lost in the semi-finals so the final game was getting ready to start. The two teams in the finals were already “trash talking.” Thanks ESPN.
As the game was about to begin, the parents and fans of the two teams were trash-talking, too. Small gym. Close proximity. A couple of near fights broke out. The apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree.

It was demeaning and embarrassing anyway you look at it. What was learned that day by either team? The problem lies with coaches and parents. The coaches have forgotten what their job is and the parents have no idea how to be parents to performing children.

For insights into this dilemma go online at lulu.com and purchase Coach Todd’s book, “Hey Mom, Where’s My Glove.”